Dedicated to a good friend, and all other Merlles and Moyles out there.


Once upon a time,
When the world was truly sublime,
There came a half-grown girl
Whose name was that of Merlle.
She was always awfully kind
As I’m sure that you will find,
To those who were in need
And always performing a random good deed.

Merlle resided in a quaint town
Managing a Lost and Found
After moving from the city,
For she found the country bright and pretty.
The townsfolk all admired her
Because of the tasty martini’s she would either shake or stir.
So one might question why
Merlle would never have a guy.

Unattractive, her looks were not,
Nor was the collection of books she had bought.
Are you scratching your head?
Be prepared to be amazed instead,
For I know the reason,
Though it may sound decievin’,
But I would never tell a lie
As to why Merlle never loved a guy.

It all began last year
In springtime filled with cheer.
At around quarter to four
Merlle was working in her empty store.
Walking in was a woman lookin’
For her watch that was tookin’.
Well, this woman was more of a lady,
And her name was Mrs. Charles Sadie.

After describing the watch as green,
Mrs. Sadie exclaimed “Your eyes shine like beams!”
This came as the surprise
Which began our Merlles’ demise.
Mrs. Sadie slowly moved in,
Giving a dreamy grin,
And laid upon Merlle a dainty kiss
On the lips with carelessness.

Experience Merlle did lack
Yet surprisingly, she kissed back.
For a long time they did stand
Facing each other, hand in hand.
A couple squeezes and gropes
Led to eyebrows raised in the hopes
That two would become one
In the future days to come.

I am sorry to dishearten you,
(All I’ve told so far is true),
But the further details are unknown
So call your friends all on the phone!
Because the case is now closed,
And the truth is finally exposed,
As to why Merlle said of men “Never again”…
It’s because she was a lesbian.